Holding students’ attention in digital age begins with trust. Teachers need space to build it

In my first job as a special education teacher in Connecticut in the US, I taught a cohort of more than a dozen 6th graders (11 to 12 years old), nearly all boys. By the end of the first year, I realised something had changed.

I was no longer worrying about disruptive behaviour which had plagued the class previously; my students were engaged and learning. The turning point wasn’t any new technique I had employed – it was trust.

Once they knew I had their best interests at heart and I trusted them to do their part, we all felt secure to teach and to learn. This connection was forged as I supported them on tougher assignments with the right attention and emotional support.

That was the 1980s, when the internet didn’t exist and distractions were few. Today, teachers face a far tougher task of connecting with students whose world views are increasingly shaped by algorithms and influencers.

Misinformation and disinformation, while not a new phenomenon, are now a swipe away, ready to colour young impressionable minds. Artificial intelligence chatbots are becoming pseudo therapists for teens seeking non-judgmental advice on growing pains.

Against this backdrop, many young people appear to be pulling back from human connection, especially with the grown-ups around them. Yet, our studies show the opposite. Students tell us time and again that they crave authentic relationships with adults, especially at a time when their attention is scattered from constant stimulation from their devices.

This is why the role of the teacher has never been so vital. Amid competing noises, a warm trusting relationship with a teacher is one of the most valuable resources students can have to make sense of this confusing world.

In the best cases, when students encounter something online that puzzles or unsettles them, they can come up to a teacher or mentor to say: “Help me make sense of this.” This is the kind of trust that anchors learning.

A bond like this is sometimes described as a secure base, one that gives students the confidence to explore and challenge themselves while providing support when things get tough and uncertain.

But such a relationship cannot be commanded. It can only be nurtured over time by making students feel understood and respected as individuals, rather than controlled or corrected.

Taking a relationship-first mindset

The most effective teachers we see tend to view connection not as an extra task to fit into their day, but as the most important pathway to engagement and learning. The best part is that building a relationship need not demand more time.

There are countless small moments in a school day to build trust, whether it is greeting students by name, noticing when someone feels down or taking a moment to point out a student’s interest during class.

I remember standing outside every day as the buses dropped students off at school. It was a great time to connect with them and to learn about their experiences. One day, student “E” who was challenging in terms of his classroom behaviour hopped off the bus beaming. Almost immediately, the popular boy in the grade made a snide remark about E’s jacket and E’s face fell.

Because I was there, I was able to approach E to tell him how great the jacket looked, how he must be proud of it, and how nice it was to see him that day. His expression lightened and his step picked up energy. In that moment, I was able to personally let E know I recognised the challenge he faced and his hurt feelings, and that I would help in a way that was attentive and respectful.

Such micro interactions foster an environment where even disengaged students feel seen and valued – and are likely to put more trust in their teacher than the shifting advice of their social media feeds.

This holds true across all ages. Young children see the physical proximity and calming voice of an adult as offering a sense of safety; adolescents need reassurance that their perspectives matter, even when adults may not fully agree or understand. In both cases, what sustains their attention is the same: the feeling of being understood and respected.

Improving learner agency drives progress

A critical step for teachers is extending trust-building into lesson delivery itself. It may seem counterintuitive but giving students control over how they learn – a hallmark of a trusting and secure teacher-student relationship – drives academic progress.

In a coaching project that my colleagues and I undertook with high school history teachers, we encouraged them to lead with curiosity rather than control. When kids lost focus, they were not punished with more homework. Rather, they were given choices. Instead of completing the same essay as everyone else, students could work on a topic in US history that interested them.

To the teachers’ amazement, the students worked harder than they had ever done before. This project clearly showed that every student is capable of delivering advanced work when their interests are respected. Motivation follows from agency.

Sceptics might ask how such an approach might fit in systems built around high-stakes examinations. It would take creativity on the part of educators to create a parallel experience for their students. For instance, within the confines of a standard curriculum students can choose how they wish to demonstrate their understanding of selected topics. Empowerment, not forced compliance, is key.

The evidence backs this up; in our coaching project the students in those classrooms scored 10 percentile points higher than their peers who were in more confined and controlled classrooms, on the state exams.

Teachers need support too

To empower students, we need empowered teachers.

If we accept that trust and connection are central to learning, then our schools and systems must help teachers cultivate it. Too often, training leans heavily towards content delivery, but knowledge transfer alone does not lead to engagement. We need to place far greater emphasis on training that improves the quality of teacher-student interactions.

Ongoing professional development is crucial, and coaching is one of the most effective ways to achieve it. A neutral observer can often help teachers observe, identify, and reflect on how they communicate with students and manage the classroom, a key lever for improvement of interactive behaviours.

At its heart, the goal of coaching isn’t to change what teachers teach but to help them see how they convey information, respond and build trust in everyday interactions with students. Teachers around the world have described such a process as a highly valuable learning experience.

Teaching is a highly stressful profession, even under the best circumstances. When teachers feel supported, students benefit. Without that support, educators commonly experience stress, anxiety, depression and even burnout, conditions that have a ripple effect.

Frustrated or overwhelmed teachers may identify misbehaviour more than good behaviour, creating a cycle of negativity that can alienate students and drain motivation. In the worst cases, good teachers leave the profession altogether.

When we lose teachers, students lose not just an instructor, but also a steady relationship that anchors their learning and even their lives.

If we are worried about the risks of online harms, we must design policies that value relationships as part of classroom life and instruction, not apart from it. In a world of algorithms, divided attention and fake news, it is human bonds that will sustain learning.